YES, IT'S TRUE -- females masturbate, too. Although females may not feel the same physical urgency to masturbate as guys (at least not as often as guys), they definitely experience sexual arousal, particularly during puberty. It is often not only a physical experience but an emotional one as well. Remember all of those screaming, crying girls at the Beatles' concerts? That was a heavily hormone-influenced response.
Many women, whether they have masturbated or not, feel embarrassed or ashamed about masturbation. It is not usually a subject shared with your girlfriends. Some girls, anxious to please their boyfriend or to try expressing their own sexuality, will have sexual intercourse long before they are ready to deal with the emotional impact that goes with it. Masturbation is a healthy way for females to satisfy their sexual feelings and learn about their own sexual response. It is particularly important for a woman to understand her own body and sexual response, because it is not something that will be learned from a male lover For this reason, it is not surprising that many women have been sexually active for years with male lovers but have never experienced an orgasm. This is a tragedy -- and it definitely reinforces the importance of a woman being in touch with her own body and sexual response.
Why do girls masturbate? The simple answer, which is good enough for many, is that it is pleasurable, but that excludes many of the recognized and claimed benefits. Below is a short list of the more significant of these:
1. Its pleasurable !
2. It helps you relax - safer than tranquillizers, cheaper than alcohol and no side effects
3. It helps you get to sleep if you are suffering from insomnia
4. It can make you feel 'energized' and focused, making study or concentration related tasks easier
5. It gives a degree of relief from the physical discomforts many feel during periods
6. It allows you to find out what you like so that you can share your needs with a partner and have better sex
7. It is always available when sexual tensions need releasing - not always true of partner sex
8. It allows you to have as much gratification as you want, when you want it and at your speed - partner sex cannot compete
9. It takes the pressure off your partner as he/she is not the only source of your orgasms
10. It is the one form of sex with no risk of disease, pregnancy or emotional upset
11. It fits in with your life - unlike partner sex
12. It often results in more powerful and longer orgasms than other forms of sex.
13. It allows you to fantasize and act as you want - please yourself not your partner
14. No partner/audience (usually) means you can be less inhibited in your use of toys and any other item you may personally find erotic
15. You can do it at your pace and can spread it out as long as you want. Longer periods of pre-orgasmic arousal can often result in better and more satisfying orgasms.
16. It saves time when you need an orgasm - no need to find a partner - and less risk of getting involved with a jerk just because you are desperate.
17. It's free!
18. Masturbation to the point of orgasm appears to put less strain on the heart as measured by an increase in heart rate than does partner activity that results in orgasm.
The Basics Of Female Masturbation
Time, mood, place. One of the most important things to realize when masturbating is that you need to be relaxed and undistracted in order to really enjoy the experience. Think of this as your time. Take the phone off the hook, lock the door and spend some quality time with yourself. This is not always easy as it sounds, especially if you have kids and a hubby, but I really can't stress enough how important it is to try to find time. Women fill so many different roles, are many things to many people, that it's easy to forget that you are also a person. Taking time for yourself is not being selfish and is not something you should feel guilty about. Everyone needs to take some time away from the rigors of the outside world once in a while.
How you find this time is up to you. One of the ways is to go to the one safe haven in our house, the bathroom. It has a lock; it has a shower and a nice long tub for me to lie in. I can light candles or leave the main light on, I can read a book in peace and I have a very good masturbation tool in the showerhead as well as a pair of hands at my disposal. [One word of warning here if you normally masturbate with a vibrator, please make sure it's waterproof before using it in the bathtub or shower, especially if you normally use an electric one!! I'm told that electrocution is not a pleasant experience!! ]
Another option is of course the bedroom. You may want to consider putting a lock on the door, so you can completely relax without fear of intrusion. Again you have a ready-made multitude of tools at your disposal here to aid your experience if you so wish. Most bedrooms contain a mirror, in many cases a full length one. All contain pillows that can help with positions; most have a cabinet for stashing lubricant, sex toys and erotic books.
Both of the above are great options for settings and you can always dress them up for the occasion. By this I mean change the bed linen to your favorite, have some music playing in the background, light some candles, basically find an environment that you can really relax and be comfortable in. The truth is the more time you put into the preparation the more you'll get out of the experience. I find it also makes me look forward to what's to come more; the anticipation of spending time alone with myself is sometimes half the fun.
So your room is set, your candles lit and now you're wondering what the hell to do next...
Although many of the techniques listed in this section of Clitical are tried and tested, it's important to remember that none of them are guaranteed. Just because something works for one women doesn't mean it will work for another. The secret here is to really lie back take the time to really get in touch with your own body. Many women are uncomfortable with the sight of their own naked bodies. One way in which you can begin to feel more comfortable about your own body is to stop comparing it with others. Remember that each of us is individual and our bodies are a simple reflection of that individuality. Getting comfortable with your own body is an important first step to a better sex life and masturbation can aid in this.
If you're one of the many women who feel uncomfortable about taking your clothes off and seeing yourself naked there are a few simple steps you can take in the comfort of your own bedroom to help overcome this. Remember that mirror I mentioned earlier, now is a good time to go and stand in front of it. Slowly begin to undress and watch each part of your own body as it's revealed to you. Once your completely undressed, begin to stoke your body, maybe caress your neck, still watching yourself in the mirror, now slowly beginning to move your hands down your body towards your breasts, still watching. Keep doing this and take it slowly, step by step and you will find that you will become more comfortable with not only the look of your own body but also the feel of it. You may even discover erogenous zones you didn't even know you had!!
Once you're naked, pull up a chair and sit on it's edge with your legs open and take a good look at your genitals in the mirror. See all those folds and curls? They are what make you as unique as the shape of your nose or the color of your eyes. No two vulvas are the same and taking the time to get familiar with yours is time well spent. In order to feel comfortable masturbating, you need to understand your anatomy, what it does and how it can make you feel. Try pulling your labia gently apart and examining your clitoris and vaginal opening. Try gently stroking your clitoris and watch what happens in the mirror. Insert your finger into your vagina and see how it feels, some women enjoy the sensations but many don't, just remember there are no wrongs here! Just gentle exploration and getting to know yourself a little better. This is your time and no one else, so there is no pressure and no reason to wonder if what you are doing is right. If it feels good to you then you're doing it right is the general rule of thumb when it comes to self-love.
Below are some basic techniques you might like to try as you explore your body a little more:
Place your thumb and forefinger on either side of your clitoris and gently roll it between your fingers. Start slowly and gently and explore until you find the speed that works for you. A variation of this technique is to use both hands and roll your outer lips between the fingers. If your clitoris is sensitive to the touch this can be a great technique to try.
With two fingers placed directly on your clitoris move them in a circular motion. As always try varying the speed and position of your fingers.
Try drawing circles around your clitoris with your middle finger. Again a great technique if you have a sensitive clitoris like many women do.
Trace the alphabet on your clitoris with your index finger. Another great way to discover how certain stokes may affect the sensations your body can produce.
You may like to try placing a finger inside yourself and thrusting it back and forth. A little lubricant can be useful here. Then take your fingers and tap them gently against your clitoris. Vary the speed and intensity of each tap, if you're playing music listen to it's beat and try to develop a rhythm.
Try changing positions. You'll most likely be surprised just how different the sensations of all the above techniques change as you change position. Try sitting, standing, squatting or laying on your belly as well as your back.
The key here is to have fun and become comfortable with your own body and the feelings it can produce as you explore it. This is a way of learning to communicate with yourself, get in touch with your sexual side without fear of rejection or getting it wrong because remember there's no wrongs here.
As I mentioned at the beginning of this section there are as many ways to masturbate as there are women masturbating. Being comfortable with your own body is the first and most important step you will take on this journey of sexual discovery.
Sooner or later the majority of females learn to achieve an orgasm from masturbatory activity of some sort or another. Once they find a way of 'getting off' it can be the easy option to stick with that method all the time. Though that may be fine if all you want is a surefire orgasm, 'variety is the spice of life', and a few alternative techniques may just add something to your fun. In this section we have recorded a whole range of techniques that we have tried or which we have heard of and think sound practical and fun. Feel free to try any or all of them, add to them if you want and, of course, let us have details of your special ways of getting off.
The simple truth is, there are as many different masturbation techniques as there are women masturbating, and that's more than you might think!! ,If you've never tried to masturbate before then begin by using what you have at your fingertips, umm, your fingertips, before moving onto more advance techniques and spending your hard cash on sex toys. Toys are great but there is no better way to explore yourself than with your own fingers, after all you expect your partner to!
Fingers
Most girls probably first discover masturbation by innocently touching their genitals with their fingers. Its therefore probably not surprising that hand and finger stimulation of the vulva and clitoris is reported to be the most common method of masturbation among women. It is also the easiest as nothing extra is needed for a satisfying session. So how to best do it. Nothing is ever as simple as 'one best way for all' so some real life examples picked up from various sources is possibly the best way of illustrating what is involved:
Lying on the bed facing up with legs together and ankles crossed. Index finger slipped between the labia majora so that it presses along the length of the clitoris. Gentle but firm wrist movements to make the inserted finger rub the clitoris in up and down, side to side and circular motions. Speed and strength of movement increased as excitement builds. Sensations increased by squeezing thigh muscles together at same time as finger rubbing clitoris.
Lying on back with legs drawn up and knees allowed to flop apart. Palm of hand placed on pubic mound and fingers allowed to rest on open vulva. Movement of hand to stimulate clitoris in side to side, up and down, circular and gentle pinching movements.
Lying face down on bed with both hands underneath and between legs. Fingers pressed against vulva and clitoris. Pelvic thrusts to move the genitals up and down against the fingers.
Sitting in a comfortable chair with legs well spread. Taking clitoris between the tips of both index fingers, rolling it around and pulling back on its hood to get maximum stimulation.
Water Play.
Who would have thought that two chemicals, namely hydrogen and oxygen,could be used to give you as a female pleasure, but it's true there are more ways to masturbate in water than you might think. Think bath tub here, think shower and think Jacuzzi/hot tub. All three can be used to great effect in the wonderful world magic kingdom of clitorial massage.
Shower Let's look at the most common technique which involves the use of that neat little tool, the shower head. The hand held kind are especially useful for this approach. The first thing you want to do is adjust the temperature so that it is not too hot for the sensitive area of the vagina. You can always turn up the heat once you are accustomed to the temperature. Then find a comfortable position - either sitting on a seat within the shower, or lying down in the tub. Shower stalls can be a bit confining for this form of masturbation, but there is usually enough room to sit on the floor with your legs bent. I suggest for the first time that you do this that you not stand. I've found that when I'm nearing climax that my legs tend to weaken, and we don't want any unnecessary trips to the emergency room when you accidentally slip and fall.
Now, take the shower head and let the water spray over your body, feel the tingling sensations as it sprays against your breasts. Imagine the sensations are being created by the hands of your lover and spray where you want to feel the touch. Slowly make your way down your torso to your vaginal area. Spreading your legs, let the water reach up and down the insides of your thighs, and when your ready for advancing, move it closer to your clit. Remember that direct contact with your clit may be overpowering, so try moving the water stream back and forth. Try bringing it closer, and moving it farther away to cover a larger area.
You also might note that shower massagers come with many different settings to adjust the streams of the water - everything from mist to pulse. Experiment, try them all! Start with the lightest amount of pressure and work your way up. If you are sitting, you can always operate the water with one hand, and use the fingers on the other hand to either stimulate your breasts and nipples, or you can insert a finger or two and see how that feels.
The main point is to relax and let your body feel all that is happening to it. If it feels good, keep doing it. If it's not right, try sitting in a different position, change the water temperature, try a different pulse setting anything that makes if feel better.
Bath TubNow we can move onto the bathtub. Like the shower head the bathtub holds many ways to excite and masturbate. Many women, myself included, enjoy lying on their backs in their bathtub and allowing the water from the faucet to wash over their vagina. This isn't always the easiest of positions to achieve but it can be great fun.
Fill the tub with water about halfway. Lie on your back, and bring your buttocks up so they are against or almost against the end of the tub with the faucet. Position your vagina as directly below the faucet as possible. Adjust the temperature and pressure of the water flow to your liking; you might have to tilt up your pelvis to bring your vagina closer to the water flow of the faucet. It might help to use one or both hands to spread open your labia (vagina "lips") so the water can flow directly onto your clitoris. Just one word of warning here, make sure the water isn't too hot! There is nothing worse that scolding your pussy and it certainly isn't pleasurable. Once you have found the right position, lie back, relax, fantasize, and enjoy!
"Occasionally I bring myself to orgasm in the bathtub. First I excite myself with fingers, and then I let the water on and get into an acrobatic position so my vagina is directly under the faucet. I start with the water warm or cool and at a low pressure on my clitoris. When I have gotten excited I run the water harder and lift myself closer to the water and let it pound into my vagina and then I come and it's the most fantastic feeling."
Another technique that can be fun involves filling an empty detergent bottle (one with a nozzle) or shampoo bottle with warm water. Sit in a full bath tub, ensuring your vulva is at least a couple of inches under water. Put the nozzle of the bottle as close as you like to your clitoris and squeeze. After each squeeze the bottle will spring back into shape, sucking in more water so there will be no need to stop for a refill.
Jacuzzi/Hot TubIf your lucky enough to own a hot tub/Jacuzzi,then the chances are you're already aware of the wonderful effects that the water that flows from it's jets can have on your body. I like to begin by simply relaxing in the tub and allowing the water to wash over me. At this point I'll open my mind and begin to fantasize, sometimes touching my breasts, other times just lying back and relaxing. Once my mind is aroused, I'll turn towards the water jets and position my vagina clitoris so it's directly in the path of the flowing water. A word of caution here: Never position yourself to close to the jet, as the flow of water is normally very strong from these jets. Begin by placing a fair amount of distance between yourself and the water jet and then move closer until you discover a spot that places just the right amount of pressure on your clitoris. Once you've found the right position, relax and enjoy the soothing sensation of the water as it washes over your body.
